Hello all,
After a dramatic four-day hiatus from having a computer, I’m typing on a fresh new MacBook Air. The people at the Apple Store were so nice and made such fierce (sensual?) eye contact (even when they were giving me the runaround) that I wondered if they were coached by the same people as the Trader Joes employees.
I haven’t had a new laptop in five years and it’s so nice to not be typing atop a mountain of crumbs in the keys. Everything feels so swift!
I haven’t released a newsletter episode since February 6, so there is A LOT to cover.
Cat TV- Poppy has started watching cat TV on Youtube every day and she is glued. She just sits in front of the TV gazing until she flops onto her side and gazes from there. She’s just like her momma. Maybe she’ll write her own newsletter. One of the Cat TV episodes features two squirrels having a picnic at a little table while bugs fly in and out.
Wordle- Idk if Wordle existed last time I released an episode. I usually get it in 4 or 5, gotta get back to 2 or 3.
I weasled my way back on Poshmark after a life-long ban.
Love Island Fever Dream - There is a new playlist on Spotify called Love Island Fever Dream and I’ve never found or made a playlist that encapsulated my music interests so well. All of the songs are watered down, popified versions of slightly older songs (like from 2011).
My new fitness journey is pilates and it has been more humbling than my other fitness ventures. Every class the instructor will say “how tall are you??” and “you can do this one from the floor, Charlotte.” But the more humbling I find a class, the more I am determined to stay with it (hence why I won “most improved” rather than “MVP” for my middle school, high school, and college swim teams).
Ok, lots of scam-related shows to discuss. And thank the lord, Bri is back with her movie reviews!!
I’m so glad I waited to release this because two of my favorite shows of the month premiered over the weekend
Dropout (Hulu)- THIS is what a scammer show should be. I read John Carreyrou’s book, listened to all the podcast episodes on Elizabeth Holmes, and was still pleasantly surprised by the story telling in The Dropout. I laughed out loud multiple times - the laughs always snuck up on me. I would guffaw and look around the room being like “did anyone see that” and Poppy would nod. They do such a good job telling the story without making Elizabeth too sympathetic (like another show called ahem, Inventing Anna). You get a sense of Elizabeth’s conniving, practiced, WEIRD personality and how she drew people in and got away with her con (for a while)
Pieces of Her (Netflix)- ooooh a mystery thriller based on a book. Methinks I’ll enjoy this. And it’s by Karin Slaughter, the queen of super dark, twisty thrillers. A daughter unearths secrets about her mom played by Toni Collette (who my dad has always found “unsettling”) in a small Georgia coastal town. I LOVE when shows take place in tiny towns in the US that I’ve never heard of but give me a real sense of what the town would be like. This one is on the coast and in a swampy area with all these twisty turny ravines, humidity, and bugs.
Severance (Apple)- Um hate to brag but my former boss represents the writer of this show. I read the pilot episode on my first day of work and couldn’t focus on onboarding because I had to find out what happened. The show is so sleek and well done. Also, hate to brag again I really do but I went to a premiere party for this show a couple weeks ago. I fretted over my outfit all day so that I would look really “casual cool just popping by” but also “I belong here and am very sleek and in the know”. I ended up wearing a green blouse, so, yeah, you can say I fit in pretty well.
Abbott Elementary (Hulu) - Such a good workplace comedy. It feels like a classic and not too edgy or dark. I am completely hooked and laugh every episode. There is of course a blossoming romance and endless silly misunderstandings and hijinx.
Inventing Anna (Netflix) - Do you miss Scandal? If so, the entire cast is in Inventing Anna. Ok, so this was fun to watch but why were the journalist and lawyer so upset in the end that Anna got convicted? Were they conned by her? Idk, when I compare this to The Dropout, it just feels disjointed and very pro- scammer. But guess who appears in episode 5? Chris Lowell of Veronica Mars and How I Met Your Father fame :) How lucky are we?
How I Met Your Father (Hulu)- A romance is blossoming with Chris Lowell (see above). I wonder if he’s the one. Probably not because we will need to go in circles for 6 seasons just to realize that the father was an inconsequential character that we didn’t expect. Still love it.
Girl Before (HBO Max) - Well, well, well. Another mystery/thriller based on a book I’ve read. This one changed a lot from the original book. So much so that it didn’t feel like the same story. That’s fine! It was a London, glossy production with long peacoats and impeccable fashion.
911 (Hulu) - I was jonesing for a procedural drama. 911 is the story of first responders in LA. It’s a Ryan Murphy production so of course there are like 75 dramatic, over the top moments every episode. I’m very invested in all the characters and I’ve been turning to it for comfort on my long work days. Queens Connie Britton and Jennifer Love Hewitt are in it! And the dad from Parenthood!
Reality
Love Is Blind (Netflix) - Love Is Blind Season Two was GOODDDD. I watched the entire thing without fast forwarding or skipping episodes like I did on season 1 or Married At First Sight. I feel like it’s been talked and meme’d to death (at least where I get my news). I will say that Shake made my blood boil in the reunion and I truly don’t think he’ll ever feel remorse for how he speaks about women.
Worst Roommate (Netflix)- Juicy true crime about evil roommates. The last two episodes are about a serial squatter who would sometimes refuse to leave places for 4 years!!
Summer House (Bravo)- Best show on TV but this is not news. Austen’s pull on these women is confounding but I relate to the feeling of having a cool frat boy pay attention to you. Austen probably has the same conversation with women across the globe!! He’s a scammer like Anna D!
Real Housewives of Miami (Peacock) - A very delightful season!! I feel like they are becoming the new number one housewives city because of how easily accessible Peacock is and the easy breezy style of the show.
MOVIES
So, Bri is going to step in with her reviews, but I need to get off my chest that I watched Buddy Games (Josh Duhamel’s directorial debut) with my bestie neighbors. We all love a good stupid comedy and this one had 16% on Rotten T’s (the lower the better when it comes to comedies, right??). I was open at first but it ended up being the most fart-boy-joke-wrestle- women are props and gay men have frosted tips movie I’ve ever seen.
Ok, here’s our correspondent Bri with Movie News
The Cursed (2021) -After a town is blatantly racist, they are cursed, and the people of said town start dying day by day. Although the film's concept is promising, the execution is awful and a big snore. Just because a movie is set in the 19th century with good costuming does not automatically make it prestigious. There was zero character development, and most of the dialogue was exposition. The storytelling was abysmal, and multiple scenes were repeated shot by shot. If you are going to make a horror movie around 2 hours long, it better be good (e.g., The Shining). Throw this film away. I’m so mad I saw this in theatres and spent around $30.00 on concessions. Grade: F
Obsessed (2009) - If you didn’t know that Beyoncé and Idris Elba starred in a 2009 thriller together, you are genuinely lost and need to get your life back on track. The concept is simple but is played out in the most entertaining and gripping way possible. After a new temp is hired (played by Ali Larter), she begins a very unhealthy obsession with her boss (played by Idris Elba). The soundtrack features Estelle, Jill Scott, and Beyoncé herself, so you are still left jamming during the plain establishing shots of Los Angeles and unnecessary montages. Even if you don’t think Obsessed (an instant cult classic in my book) is not worth the watch, the last fifteen minutes is so well done and iconic you will be wailing. I’ll Venmo you $1,000.00 if it doesn’t. Grade: B+/A-
Chronicle (2012) -During a high school rave, three boys discover a hole in the ground that leads them to some bubbly rocks. The boys then recklessly touch the bubbles and are gifted with telekinesis. I haven’t watched this film in a decade, and many of the jokes don’t land, but Chronicle is a solid and very impressive directorial debut by then 27-year-old Josh Trank. This found-footage sci-fi is filled with crispy special effects and great sound. Additionally, the film contains a stubble philosophical theme that weaves effortlessly through the story and makes for a strong ending. Sadly, Chronicle will not be receiving an A from me because of the film’s rough start. After the first 20 minutes, you will be fully in. Grade: A-
Arthur’s First Day (2021) -In honor of the beloved children’s show Arthur ending its 25-year run last week, I decided that it would be an excellent time to revisit everybody’s favorite aardvark before I watch every single Oscar-nominated film. After over two decades of being in the 3rd grade, Arthur’s First Day documents Arthur’s first day of 4th grade and D.W.’s first day of kindergarten. D.W. and Arthur even have new outfits! Arthur’s yellow sweater is now puke green with a yellow stripe, while D.W. sports a navy blue Gab Kid’s inspired dress. I laughed out loud and smiled gleefully multiple times throughout my watch. Arthur and Buster have to deal with not being in the same class, while D.W. navigates being the most popular girl in kindergarten. The writing, the animation, and the voice acting is top-notch, as it’s always been. Arthur has so much soul, and even though it’s not on my TV Time watch list, it still holds a permanent place in my heart. Grade: A
Ok, bye! TTYL! Like and subscribe, etc :)