Hello.
I’m using an ice roller on my face and it is so pleasant. I’m having an overall pleasant summer. I have a tiny shard of glass stuck in my foot but who doesn’t these days.
My purse fell over in front of the guy from Suits (the young one who is married to Spencer from Pretty Little Liars!) and it was a purse I used to put misc trash hurriedly when I moved from my last apartment. There I was sitting nicely, trying not to breathe too loudly in front of Suits guy, when my bucket bag (hate to brag) fell over and loose gum, toothpicks, floss, cat toys, a sock, coins, wrappers, and red dust from when I visited Utah last year cascaded to the floor. It was already one of those days when I wasn’t feeling 100 pct because unfortunately, the lighting in my apartment didn’t let me know that my maxi dress was 100pct see-through. It must have been more meant for a beach cover-up but I was shocked when later I peeped a peek at myself in the bathroom mirror.
That day I also cracked open a sparkling beverage only to discover it was cannabis-infused tea. (I’m don’t do well with cannabis-infused things. I know I know— go to the dispensary and tell them that you have anxiety and sleep problems or whatever and they will match you with your perfect strain. It doesn’t work. I feel every time like my heart has turned into a knife and my eyelids are Vasoline, ok?)
Later in the month, I decided it was a very good idea to ween myself off of antidepressants. It was fine until the air in my apartment became too itchy and I got road rage from someone simply turning left.
I also had a dissatisfying experience googling- "what is my body type?” Because apparently, it helps to choose stores based on your bod-type. Pro tip: Abercrombie and Free People are for rectangles (lucky bastards). I left that experience with more questions than answers. Am I an apple on stilts with a cinched waist? Which store is best for that shape?
Reality
The Bachelorette (ABC) - I’ve been watching about one-third of each episode and then getting distracted by making licorice tea and Tik Tok. I relate to Katie’s questionable style. She and I aren’t “pick me” girls. I hear good things about Michael A and Andrew T but couldn’t tell ya who either of them is.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo) - this season is thrilling!! Kathy Hilton is such a treat. I think she’s doing the same thing as Paris in The Simple Life and playing dumb, but it’s working! Erica’s sprawling tale about Tom’s car accident was something else.
Top Chef All-Stars (Bravo) - Top Chef is tied with Survivor as one of the most reliable shows.
Too Hot To Handle (Netflix)- I loved the British lad with the fake teeth that he insisted were real! Photo above.
Love Island UK (Hulu) - Ok so I have said in the past that this is my favorite show of all time. I even coined July as Love Island July (I’m very cheeky!) And sometimes one’s favorite show has to go through a rough patch. A metamorphosis (or lack thereof in this case). I’m still holding out hope that this season will get better when we reach Casa Amor but I’m not hooked like I usually am.
Scripted
I Think You Should Leave (Netflix)- I need to ice my face (with my ice roller) from laughing. This show makes me laugh more than any show ever has (I’m not being dramatic, this is true. Even more than Happy Endings!!).
White Lotus (HBO)- The judgemental teens are terrifying! I wouldn’t survive a run-in with them.
Kevin Can F*** Himself (AMC) - The Boston accents are as terrible as the show is good (hehe).
Dead Water Fell (AMC/ some British channel) - You know how I’ve been looking for my next Broadchurch? Well, this is almost it. David Tennant stars (of course).
Doctor Death (Peacock)- Goodbye good guy Pacey and hello scary Joshua Jackson as a killer, loser doctor! This show is GOOD and I think there’s a sister documentary coming out this week!
Manifest (Netflix) - Where to begin…I don’t like this show but it seems to be the only show I’ve watched over the past two weeks. I prefer to watch it on mute so that I can tune in and out. I like how the main guy’s face is very worried all the time! I relate because I have resting worried face (it’s my eyebrows, they slope dramatically).
Dave (FX) the premiere of season 2 was so painfully mean and cringey I had to stop watching :(
Gossip Girl Reboot (HBO MAX)- this time the teachers are Gossip Girl which is even lamer than Dan Humphry being Gossip Girl. Remember that famous tween journalist Tavi Gevinson? She plays the teacher.
Ted Lasso (Apple)- I’m putting Ted Lasso last because this list isn’t really in any order and there’s only one episode out, so I don’t quite have a handle on what the season will be yet. I’m going to let some episodes pile up before I watch again.
Movies
I panicked when I looked at my notes and realized the only ~films~ I watched this month were Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants and Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2 (they hold up! those girls are DRAMATIQUE), but I also watched Black Widow (highly recommend! I have not hot takes on it other than it’s fun to watch).
Books
The Push by Ashley Audrain - “Mother, Daughter, Angel, Monster” — I read this in one sitting. Creepy deepy Rosemary’s baby vibes.
Winter Counts by David Heska Wanbli Weiden - A psychological thriller (the only genre I read) set at an Indian Reservation in South Dakota. I’m halfway through and they are about to drive to Denver to catch whoever is bringing heroin onto the Rez!
Ok, bye!! We’re approaching the one-year anniversary of the newsletter— thank you for reading <3
I love reading this!!!! 😍
Lol 😂 so good